{the gardening itch}

Every January, when everything in the garden is asleep, my gardening genes kick in. Johnny's Selected Seeds catalog

comes in the mail and I start dreaming about my summer garden. In the cold, grey days of January, I forget about the 

almost unbearable heat and humidity of July and August, when I am so sick of my garden {except harvesting those 

luscious heirloom tomatoes} that I won't even go outside during the day unless absolutely necessary. I forget how tired 

and drained the temperatures make me feel, low energy keeping me from one of the things I love the most.

All I can think about now is how beautiful everything is when it bursts forth and blooms, everything turning lovely 

shades of green and every color of the rainbow. The smell of dirt, the feeling of earth between my fingers; it's enough to 

make me giddy. We are fortunate here in North Carolina to be blessed with a long springtime; beautiful, warm days 

without the humidity that will later make us question why we live in the south.

I thought I'd share a few pictures of my garden with you today, a reminder of warmer days to come...

{january sky}

The sky outside suits my mood today. It makes you want to curl up in a cozy chair with a blanket and get lost for hours in a good book. An excellent selection is The wabi-sabi house: the Japanese art of imperfect beauty by Robyn Griggs Lawrence. I am finding myself drawn to all things Japanese of late...especially their aesthetic.

Wabi-sabi invites us to set aside our pursuit of perfection and learn to appreciate the simple,unaffected beauty of things as they are. It is an aesthetic that welcomes comfort and subtle spirituality into the home. It is about simplicity and humility, things that I crave more and more as I get older. It is very appealing to me.

Check it out. It will ring as truth to your soul.  

Peace~J

{beautiful art for inspiration}

These images are from etsy seller Jennifer Judd-McGee. All images are copyright 2007 jennifer judd-mcgee. You can see more of her work here.

I just love her lines and shapes, and how she uses color. The third image, 4 birds in a tree, looks like a quilt, but it is paper. I think it's lovely. Thank you Jennifer!

I will continue to try and find images that inspire for this new year. Check back often to see what I've found!

Also....

Yesterday was a productive day. I finished organizing and cleaning my studio and was able to begin what I hope will be a motivating blog.

Motivation is sometimes hard to come by when you are a stay-at-home mom or anyone who spends most of there time away from other artists. It's so much easier to be creative when you are working with other creatives, like taking a painting class or joining a guild or gallery. The internet, especially blogging, has made our world a much smaller place and we can now go anywhere in the world and see art and speak with other artists; but it's not the same as working with and around other creatives on a regular basis. At least that's how I see it.

When you work from home, the biggest challenge is just Beginning...taking the time to bring ideas to fruition...it's so easy to let the laundry or the vacuuming call to you, making you feel guilty. There are too many reasons NOT to start.

I, for one, have resolved not to hear the loud voices of household appliances or dirty anything calling my name this year. Hopefully, I can organize my time so that it all gets done. Or not...

Well, must go for now. I hope your day brings many aha moments and much joy. ~J

welcome 2008! {or,'thank god christmas is over!'}

I can't help it, I'm glad it's over. It's just too much stress, too many expectations, too much money, and my mother. Now that everyone is back at work/school/home I can finally get about starting the new year with high hopes for a healthy, productive, happy year.

One of my goals is to give more time and attention to this blog. Ideally, I would like to post an entry every day, but we'll see.

Another of my goals this year is to be a productive artist/designer. I have so many ideas; it's just bringing them to fruition. I will share my attempts here, with you.

I'm currently facinated with Project Runway. Because I have some background in fashion and textile design, I am dying to audition for the show. I've researched it, but there doesn't seem to be anything happening with auditions at this time. I keep checking on bravotv; hopefully something will surface soon.

So, my focus right now seems to be on fashion. I vacillate between many art and craft mediums, but right now it's clothing construction and design.

Another goal today is to organize my studio space so that it functions the way I need it to. It is impossible for me to work with all my supplies tucked away in boxes. I have to be able to see everything that is available to me. Unfortunatley, my space is right in the middle of the house and cannot be closed off from the main living area, so it always looks messy when I set it all out. Oh well, everyone will just have to get over it. I have to create!

Here's to a new year full of health and hope, blessings and love. ~J

{the christmas crazies}

Every year I tell myself "I WILL be prepared for the holidays NEXT year". Ha!

Once again, here it is, 5 days until THE day, and I'm scrambling. "Last Minute Lucy" strikes again!

Anyway, I cannot believe it's been 3 weeks since my last post. I have given up trying to make it work before the holidays. But this blog is on my to-do-list for the new year. So, don't give up on me!

2008 will bring crafting, art, and design galore! And more!

I have posted a photo of a painting I created last year. The photo is really dark, sorry. Evie is really very colorful and intense. I love to paint beautiful girls. Evie was a late night journal sketch that I liked and decided to paint.

I wish everyone the happiest holidays ever!! See you in the New Year!!

{night owl}

Once again it is after midnight as I write this post. It's so hard to get back into a normal bedtime routine. It's driving me crazy because everyone else in the family gets up with the sun. But it seems no matter how hard I try, I can't get to bed at a reasonable hour. There never seem to be enough hours in the day. And I don't feel like I've accomplished even one quarter of the things on my "want-to-do-list". I get frustrated because it seems to be getting worse instead of better. Maybe it's my age. Or my illness.

Anyhoo — still working on the magazine. The deadline changed to Monday. I wasn't sure whether to laugh or cry. Need the time but just want to be finished!!! Move on, ya know? Christmas coming....

I will post some pictures tomorrow!!! 'Til then...

~ Be kind ~ J

{3:36 a.m.}

Yes, I'm crazy. I am on a major deadline for the magazine. Thought I'd post a frenzied note.

NOTE: This blog is a work in progress. Progress is very slow. It should pick up speed after Friday, deadline day. My 'Black Friday'.

I am going to bed now, really. Sorry no photos today...soon. ~ J

{me}

Day 1  of my new adventure into the unknown...blogging. At my age, I feel like if I don't move forward into the 21st century, my mind will catch up to my body and I'll really start to feel old. Not that 47 is old. As I near the mid-century mark, I realize that old is a matter of perspective.

When I was ten, even 20, I could not fathom being forty. I simply could not conceptualize it. I thought about it, but it was weird. Now, nearing 50, I realize that I don't feel any different today than I did then. Well, my body does, but not my mind. Or my heart. In my heart I am still the same 10-year-old girl that saw the world with wonder and awe, waiting for what was just  around the corner.

Which is why I am sometimes shocked when I pass my reflection in a mirror or window; I look at the person staring back at me and think "Who is that?". I realize that this is in part because of a significant weight gain in recent years and I have just about stopped looking at myself in the mirror, but it is still unsettling. It is always a surprise. I just don't think of myself as old. Wiser, but still young, still me.

Anyway...

Let me tell you a little something about myself. I am a 47-year-old artist and mother of two beautiful daughters, ages 21 and 13. They are very gifted, funny young women with strong opinions and ideas and I enjoy them immensely. They are a continual source of inspiration and keep me young and cool {I think}.

I am fortunate to have a very loving, patient husband, David, without whom, I acknowledge, I could not manage. I am difficult at best, yet he is endlessly supportive and kind.

At the age of 37, I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia, which changed my life {and the lives of my family} as I knew it. I was devastated. It won't kill you, but sometimes it makes you feel like you want to die.

At the age of 40, I was diagnosed as Bipolar {this also sometimes makes you feel like you want to die}. This was an epiphany for me. Finally, answers to all the questions about my mercurial behavior. Suddenly, everything made sense. I am amazed {and a little sad, and maybe a little angry...} that no one recognized there was something wrong.

Since then, I have come to understand and ultimately love myself, something I have never done before. It makes the world a better place. The lithium helps.

I was an art major in college, attaining a BS in Art Education and a BFA with a Fibers concentration, along with a minor in textile design and a minor in business. I accomplished all this in five years while holding down as many as three jobs at a time {I was supporting myself and paying for my education} and graduating magna cum laude. You'd think someone would have had a clue...

I ended up in graphic arts {I could actually make a living this way} as an art director for publishing companies in Shelby and Charlotte. The experience was invaluable though, since I am now using those skills to do freelance graphic design work out of my home, and I always love learning something new.

My girls are artistic, also. My daughter Jessica {21} is studying psychology and art at UNC Chapel Hill; she plans to open an art therapy studio.

My daughter Annie {13} loves to do all things artsy and craftsy and participates in art class and the art club at her school. She has been dancing {ballet, jazz, tap, lyrical} since she was three-years-old and hopes to continue through college and beyond. She also loves drama and has performed in many community theatre productions and in drama at school. She aspires to attending SCAD {Savannah College of Art and Design} to study architecture. She loves to sit with me and just create! 

I feel so lucky to have such great girls!!!!!

For the most part, my life revolves around nurturing, creating, gardening, reading, music, books, my family and my pets.

Oh pets! I have great pets! 

There is:

1. Overactive Olive the Border Collie, the sweetest, smartest dog in the world!;  
2. Zany Zoe the 'on her own planet' Calico, who's favorite thing to do is sit on our pedestal sink and stare at the nite light all night long {we think it speaks to her}; 
3. Silly Lily the Grey Tabby, who thinks she's a princess and sleeps with us under the sheets {sometimes David will make a tent for her under the covers by putting his knees up}; 
4. Manic Milo, a very attractive Grey Tabby with a white face and a pink nose, who loses his mind every night around 10 pm {as a neutered male, Milo doesn't understand those 'weird' feelings he gets sometimes}. Milo is the most vocal and affectionate cat I've ever had and everybody loves him! He will let you do just about anything to him. And so sweet and funny. And last, but certainly NOT LEAST, is: 
5. MommaCat, the mother of them all. She doesn't get along with any of them, so she stays outside, which is fine with her. She was a stray who adopted us and then had 8 kittens in our garden. Of course, I had to take them in. We found homes for five of them, kept two, Milo and Lily, and the littlest one died. We had MommaCat spayed, put a collar with a name tag and bell on her {so she can't catch the sweet birdies} and had all her shots administered. She is now fat and healthy, especially FAT!!!!!!

Speaking of fat, I hope everyone had a good Thanksgiving holiday. Mine was lovely because I didn't have to cook this year! We went to my mother's house in Lenoir. We had good food, good times, and good fun playing games! I had a most excellent Scrabble win - I love to use all my letters and blow away the competition! Eat my dust.

We came home Friday night, late. While it was wonderful to visit with Mom, it was so nice to be home! Annie said, "Ooohhh, it smells like our house!",  and all the pets came running down the stairs to greet us {except Olive, who went with us; she travels very well} It's always nice to come home!!!

I'm feeling guilty because I've spent so much time on this blog today. I should have been decorating for Christmas. As always, I am not ready and feeling overwhelmed by the thought of it.

Well, gotta say goodbye. I have no idea if anyone will be remotely interested in reading my thoughts. I'll keep it up for awhile, anyway. I'll try to post pictures tomorrow.

Be kind to one another ~ J